Saturday, October 24, 2009

Finding life between the heartbeats.

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Writing and music
and laughter and sorrow.
Christmas and celebration
and birth and death.
Life is showing its seasons.
Here in October
I am given the gift of Christmas
from David A. a bit early.
It reminds me of the birth
at a time when I am mourning
the loss of a life.

I am so thankful
for every experience in my life.
They all color
the palet of my heart.

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Pause

I have found
that it is only
when I am forced
to stop and ask
for help
that the answers
come to me.

They are there
resting
in the space
between
expectation
and regret.

As of late
life has opened
a way to
stillness.
Grief
can open the door
as can joy
and laughter.

So as I grieve
I also feel
my heart opening
and ready
for the miracle
given to me
whenever
I pause
and surrender.



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This is the answer I received when I asked for help.


Being
Robert Montgomery



Don’t think. Just be.
All pain comes from thinking.
It separates us from life
placing experience in the mind
rather than the soul-body-mind.
Life here must be shared.

Yet spirit rules
even where it has no wish to.
It will always yield to the mind
for the spirit has no agenda.
It exists outside of time.
It has no use of fear.

The mind must rule to survive.
Such is its delusion.
A prisoner of time and space.
Fear is its greatest ally.
For this sword keeps us earthbound.
Here we can lose, be hurt, and die.

Even religion has given itself
to the mind’s control.
How else could we have imagined
a punishing God
or a hell of retribution?
The mind creating a God in its image.

We truly worship a false idol.
We bow down to the laws of loss and decay.
We praise judgement and damnation.
Never before has the wood of the cross been so strong.
Humanity nailed to a realm of fear.

Yet spirit resides here.
It sparkles within everything.
Unconcerned with the laws
of space and time.
True freedom- free dominion.

The challenge
is to cherish the mind
yet not to exalt it.
If befriended, it can do us no harm.
“Love your enemies, and they are enemies no longer.”

Give yourself the gift of stillness.
as often as is possible throughout the day.
Take a moment
one heartbeat to connect
with the truth of spirit within you.

In this way
you will begin to lay a foundation
of timelessness within time.
Creating a bridge over which you cross
from moment to moment.

With discipline and faith
you will begin to see
that your true life
exists within these moments
between the heartbeats.

You have felt them
so many times before
yet didn’t understand.

Caught in the beauty
of a golden sunrise,
suspended in the innocent laughter
of happy children,
transfixed by the magic
of a Christmas tree.

These are the moments
outside of time
where the soul reveals its secrets.

Not going anywhere
yet resting
in the Holy connection
between thought.

The mind then becomes the friend
which guides us back to the bridge.
Not thinking.
Just being.





Tuesday, October 20, 2009

the wheel turns...

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A few days ago
I was sitting
on my bed
with my dog
and I thought
to myself
remember this
moment
because it is
perfect
and it will
not last.

It is that
understanding
that nothing
lasts forever
which allows
us to move
forward
and outward
into more
life.

Today
I lost
a friend
and the grief
is like water
flowing through
and around me
and just as
that moment
of perfect
peace
I knew would
flow through
and past me
so too
will this.

It is
the gift
of surrender
when we
have
no other
options
when the pain
is too much
and God
is our only
salvation.

Tonight
I will be
one with
my grief
allowing it
to flow down
and through me
cleansing me
leaving me
fresh
and ready
for the return
of peace

It is
the heartbeat
of humanity
I feel tonight
playing out
the dance
of life.


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For my friend Jack


I wonder
about time
and this life
running before me
like a river
wild and free
powerful
and unpredictable
asking how
can it mean anything
when every day
melts
into yesterday
revealing
tomorrow's dreams
as today's adventure.

my heart
has embraced
so many shining
breaths
of eternity
tearing me
open
and leaving me
raw
and broken
open
to the next embrace
crying
for the loss
of innocence
praying
for the wheel
to stop.

yet how
can sunlight
be held
in a fist of panic
how can a laugh
linger longer
even as the next breeze
takes it away
leaving only echoes
of happiness
memories unreliable
misty and vague
as time rolls on
the illusion
that I move through
this epic story.

glimpses
of beauty
heartbeats
of perfection
a gentle glance
a knowing smile
these are the threads
which weave
the tapestry I wear
about me
warming me now
on this clear cool
autumn eve
a cloak of memory
promise
of a warrior's dance
in humble wonder
of this miracle
called life.




Saturday, October 17, 2009

ready to be an instrument...

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Held
Robert Montgomery


Gentle morning...
I am calm
and focused...
Remembering
the lessons
I have been
reminded of.

Ready to be
an instrument
of God's
healing
on Earth.

The day sings
the song of waking...
Birds in joyous chorus
to the Heavens
above.

I drink
from the font
of eternal Truth...
the water
the sweetest...
coolest
and thirst
quenching.

Who can find
any agenda here
but God's?

His hands...
hold us.
His arms...
wrap about us.
His voice...
leads us...

Back
to what
we would
remember.

Here
in this
moment
of eternity.

I stand
once again
at Heaven's
door.

Asking...
for instruction.
Asking...
for guidance.
Asking...
for acceptance.

And I know
that all
is given
the moment
I am
willing
to remember.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Opening the Window

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I had a brief moment in college
when I thought,
"I am going to write poetry."
and so I did.

I bought a journal
and I sat down to write
and out came a voice
I had never heard before.

It was the voice
which was always there
in my times of joy
and of sorrow.

It was the voice
of the morning mist
and the caress
of the afternoon breeze.

When I stopped
to listen
I could so clearly hear
the beauty of life.

Heartbreakingly
simple really
all I needed to do
was ask.

We all have
a poet within
waiting for us
to give it permission
to speak.

This is one of the few pieces
I wrote back in 1985
when I let the window open
and gave myself the opportunity
to sing with my heart.

I read it
25 years later
and it is as if
I wrote it yesterday.

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the day has come
Robert Montgomery


a private morning
I rise to starlight
flecks of light
clinging to the last moments
of night.

Air renewed
cool. crisp
lying ready
for the use of new day.

Where is the sun?
this yellow giant
who fires the world
in ageless splendor.

Mighty ruler
sleeping still
I set out,
in anticipation
of his glorious assent.

Innocence,
purity
simple solitude
the street so barren
yet soon to be trodden
by foot and bike
its cargo now slumbering
behind shades of gray

and I alone
sharing silence
a private time

orange, yellow
the coloring of dawn
spread quickly behind mountains
hiding

it reaches outwards
brighter, brighter
until all is drenched
golden, glowing

the day has come...


Nov 1985



Footnote: I wrote this piece after a morning run. It was a glorious run indeed.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

the river calls








Trust
Robert Montgomery


Awakened
to the day
Yesterday ringing
through my head.
Will I make the most

of these gifts?
Every heartbeat
heaven sent...
drumming out a call
to action.
Calming a mind
which plays the tapes:
"You must do this!"
"You should do that!"
Regret and guilt
are the motivation
of a world still sleeping.
I listen
to the song within...
a river
taking me
through chaos
to paradise...
homecoming.
And here
we all meet
again
for the touching
of souls
is eternal...
a flame unwavering
in the fiercest storm.





Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Heaven and Earth...living in both worlds.


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Much of my writing
speaks to homecoming.

It speaks to the call
our souls hear

above and beyond
this physical life.

When I feel most at peace
I lose my connection

to time and space
and am just
simply present.


We are spirit
trying to live
within a physical
realm.

And so we are faced
with the paradox

of life and death,
heaven and earth,
love and fear.

We are constantly
pulled
between
the extremes of life

trying to find
a balance between.

I am not sure
we will ever
achieve balance

for to find balance
you must be thrown off of it
from time to time.

For me
life is like the tides,

like the seasons,
like the breath.

It is always
changing
and renewing.

It is a gift
of rebirth
in every moment.

I know
that joy
will pass
and so to
will sorrow.

It is this dance
between the spirit
and the physical
which is life.


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Above and Below
Robert Montgomery

Why do I love so deeply
yet hold back at times
afraid of drowning
in such tempestual waters?

The surface of love
would seem to be so,
unsure, shifting with the wind,
the only order being chaos.

Yet beneath it all
is the great and mighty sea,
supporting, comforting,
holding every golden moment
safe and gentle.

Cool
within it depths
all is here.
Nothing is lost
to the surface storm
of time.

The illusion is all
when I live here
above love
not sinking down
into its welcoming embrace.

Above
there can be loss
confusion
and heartbreak.

Yet here
is where I must live
and love
laughing and crying
with the wind.

Dancing
and rejoicing
within times
seeming mastery.

A duality
of one
for one is part
of the other.

Life is of love
and love is life.
There is no above or below
where all is one.



Sunday, October 4, 2009

Radiant...

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wheel

Robert Montgomery


do I live on a line?
or is it a wheel?
here to there
or all from a center?
radiating.

to walk a line
leaves me
unstable...
neither here nor there
past, future
all moving...
no connection.

the wheel gives me
a center
and as I turn
past, present, future
all connect
like ripples
in a still summer lake.


I live on a wheel.




Saturday, October 3, 2009

Pictures from life...

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Why?


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Because
Robert Montgomery


freedom
free dominion
the domain
of the free
freedom

I am writing because ...
I know that there is something ...
wanting for a voice within me...
always there ...
waiting to be released...
patient and insistent...
furious and gentle...
builder and destroyer...
it is the me of the ages...
this pallet
richly stained ...
by the eruption of Life...
too long away...
I linger here...
timeless moment...
sure to be swallowed...
again in times delusion....
the focus obscured...
until the crystal...
shines clear again...
and I wonder...
have I been away?...
so much like a dream...
these times away...
that I scarcely notice...
the flow...
until I am away again...
and then it is the longing...
to return...
which aches within me...
irregular heart...
yearning to beat...
with the drums of Heaven...

I am writing because...
this key has been given me...
I know what it opens...
I see the garden before me...
so many friends...
blessed kindred...
beckon me home...
I write to remember...
the key in my hand...
I write to share...
this ecstasy...
of acceptance...
and total knowing...
returning to that...
which was never forgotten...
by the heart...
beating its ancient call...
to the truth...
virgin within us...
and as I write...
I am here..
amidst Heaven's sigh...
peaceful union...
connecting me...
golden thread...
stretching into eternity...
I write to share...
I write to create...
I write to sing ...
the song of homecoming...
to all who would hear.





the memory of peace...

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Remembering Peace
Robert Montgomery



Oh peace…
when I remember you
life slows to a heartbeat.

Breath…
feeding my soul
smiling through me.

You give me
such blissful
surrender.

Deep,
gentle,
ancient rest.

Time forgotten
as illusion floats away
on the surface
of your eternal comfort.

“I rest in God”
here where meaning
is meaningless.

Oh peace
feed me the mana
for which I hunger.

Sweet homecoming
of stillness.

adrift
yet connected
through the gift
of your tranquil waters.



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